NewsWe the future

Becoming – never being enough?

By Angel Dube for We The Future!

Too fat, too skinny, too dark, too yellow, too tall, too short…

It’s always extremes. Never enough.

This sums up a woman’s life as I know it. Painfully, as I live it.

I have been having conversations on this with ladies of late. It became clear that all these comments have an impact on their lives.

All these extremes that define our bodies are part of a daily performance for the male gaze. Sadly, the gaze is never satisfied. For better or worse, we seem to care about it.

Body shaming is driving some young women to the edge. Living with a body that constantly attract criticism whether open verbalised attacks, or the subtle, often in the way of a glance whose message cannot be missed, takes a toll on one.

Suffering in silence, low self-esteem and the anxiety of never being perfect are all forms of violence that silently brew in our lives.

We often try to mitigate against this “lack of perfection” and that in itself never makes things better.

Bleaching, surgery, fasting, bingeing.

We have tried it. We have been mocked for trying to “correct” ourselves. Nothing is ever enough.


Wear what you want!

Eat what you want!

Be loved however you want!

Live however you want!

This article was produced under CITE’s We The Future project. The We The Future project seeks to increase the participation of young women in local and national governance processes through capacity building on digital skills.  

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